HAVENT YOU PEOPLE EVER HEARD OF CLOSING THE GODDAMN ADORNO

I hope no-one was arrested, hospitalized, institutionalized, and/or thrown onto a slab over the T-Giving Holiday. The pros of TGiving is that "Gratitude" and "Thankfulness" are very positive ("Win-Win") qualities which we should focus on the entire year. The cons of TGiving, of course, are screamingly obvious and probably outweigh the pros. But my point is, be grateful you're not starving on the streets or dying of CANCER.

This Sibhod might not be 100% Profound, but I like doing this just because I Can.

I went out to the Pub for my first appearance at a Major Social Gathering in 4 months. I really need to prep for these kind of events. When there is a group of more than say 3 people, and there is lots of mingling and separate subconversations, I get easily overwhelmed, and tired. But That's Ok. A little prepwork does go a long way.

I was drinking Root Beer very slowly. I only drank 2 Root Beers, whereas "Before", I would have drank at least 5 strong beers. There's something about Beer that makes you Thirsty for More Beer. But If you're just drinking plain ol' fluids, especially sugary fluids like nondiet pop, NO SALE. NO HAY MAS.

But yeah. All the people are great people, but I've just never been all-about huge groups. I prefer intimate "datelike" sessions with The Guys.

"9" (Movie)

I was finally able to pry myself out of bed on Sunday afternoon after some serious napping, and decided it'd do me well to get out of the house and do something. So I decided to go to the Cheep Show.

The movie Looked (visually) Real Good, and the monsters were real sinister. But all-in-all, it seemed kinda insignificant and forgettable. Trifling. Totally watchable, though; but I don't think it deserved all that Star Power for the Voice-Acting: Elijah Wood, John C. Reilly, Jennifer Connolly, Martin Landau, Christopher Plummer (always confuse him with Christopher Lee). Honestly. There was no reason for any of these people. This movie was not a big deal. It wasn't BAD, though, and I was very pleasantly surprised at how short it was. Under 90 minutes. It actually SEEMED short. IN A WORLD were most movies are - and seem! - unbearably long, I was thankful for this. Might have been my favourite aspect of it. More movies should be under 90 minutes!

I've learned that it's easier to go see a really forgettable movie At The Theatre than to force myself to watch a somewhat-less-forgettable movie rental At Home. Going to the Theatre provides that much of a TradeUp.

Although I ended up catching some of this movie on TV called "Big Trouble," and was very surprised at how much I liked it. It was absolutely friggen hilarious. It features Tim Allen and Dennis Farina and some broad who looks sorta like Zooey D but better-looking and Patrick Warburton and Janeane Garofalo and Jason Lee and Johnny Knoxville and some guy who sorta looks like Randy Quaid but isn't and Omar Epps. It was some stupid genre story about cops and feds and burglars and arms dealers and gangsters and wiseass civilians all getting into a clusterf in miami. This movie really is a lot funnier than it sounds, and a lot more entertaining than I ever expected. If every ridiculous movie I saw at the Cheep Show was as good as "Big Trouble", the world would be a much better place, and Your Crippling Depression would be considerably reduced to maybe say Sprained-Ankle Depression and You wouldn't need Your stupid L'n'R Libido any more.

As fun as Dragon Quest 8 is, it's also a total Time Burglar. It is a worse time-waster than Blogging, Facebook or Male-Female Relationships. (hahaha, I kid, I kid; I have officially promised to make the Sibhod more Women-Friendly). If I spent half the time on Homework as I do on DQ8, I would be done with the rest of my homework for the term. Or I'd be through all the Harry Potter Books/Movies and I could start on reading Henry Miller or Feminism or whoever I was gonna read next. Douglas Adams? I don't read anything unless it's gonna directly Get Me What I Want, is what I'm saying. And I'm not talking about the pleasure of curling up with a good book.

There are none who fetishize napping and sleep more than I. You figure that sleep's gotta be an OPIATE, right? And it's certainly ESCAPISM. And certainly the cravings for a good nap can be overpowering. But there's almost no drawbacks with Sleep, compared to other Escapist Opiates. I took a big 2+ hour nap on monday. That totally turned the day around. People who are so busy they can never take naps are terrifying. They make You feel sorta guilty for being privileged/bourge/white/smug enough to be able to take naps. People with Real Responsibilities (r) can never take naps!

Wot's my deal with Women? I don't know why I'm so fascinated with All Them. What is the deal with that. They're not all that interesting. Just like Dudes. I don't particularly have any Mommy Issues (tm), so, I'm honestly confused. All I know is, I have a Burning Desire to do Real Gay things with Hermione Granger. What would you even call that? No-where in there is a desire to Go Out Drinking, Dancing, and Hooking-Up with Random Club Types. That sounds like the Antithesis of Good Times.

Who else do You know is so ridiculously awesome that they make a 78-minute long cd with a sound file of their car-heat running at Full-Blast so they can use it as "White Noise" to help them go to sleep at night?

It's a weird and unique desire when it's Enthusiasm you desire. You know it's not there, but you have absolutely no idea how to get it there. It seems to be one of those things you either have or you don't. But maybe it's not. I dunno.

So Tiger Woods got in a fight with his wife and drunkenly drove into a fire hydrant and tree. Big Deal. Something's wrong with a person if they Don't do something like that at some point in their lives. And I don't know why they call "cheating" "cheating." It's really the only FAIR thing for everyone to do.

I've always operated from the assumption that Your Partners are Replaceable. Expendable. Tradeinable. You stay with someone (nonmonogamously, it goes without saying!) until you find someone Better. And You're not going to find someone better than Tiger Woods. He makes the best golf videogames ever.

So, as a Policy Recommendation, I encourage all Readers of the Sibhod who are (foolishly) doing anything even remotely close to Monogamy to either:

1. Starting Banging someone new and/or

2. Dump the Monoggo!

...just to show 'em they ain't so goddam Special. Just another damn dirty soul. Don't want Them to get The Big Head. Get them off their high horse. They aren't so Hot'n'Popular.

But seriously folks. You can do what you want. I just don't want You to sell Yourselves short, Special as You are!

(I've resolved for the New Year to stop being so Condescending to You Readers. Of course, Verbal Abuse is the only way I know how to show luv.)

Here's an Unanswerable Question: who makes more Chedda: Nurses or Public Schoolteachers?

I'm actually more concerned about ROI here: Who makes the higher average career income with respect to the amount of monay they sunk into educating themselves for that career?

Your ideals are gone, your dreams are dead. You don't want to save the world. You don't want to teach children or comfort the sick. You just want to make enough monay to Support Yourself and have a nice little childless Monoggo Romance-Nest with Hermione Granger.

Here's a weird dream: a woman is finally making a run from her abusive husband, who is chasing her. She runs up a stairway onto a "mezzanine/balcony" of sorts, and he is on the floor below, when a crowd of people (men?), petitioned by the lady, begins closing in behind the husband and executes him in a hailstorm of bullets. Then the woman begins running again, from the police, (but exactly why the cops are after her I dunno) and she takes some fire herself, becoming, like her husband, quite disfigured in the face region. Outside, it becomes clear the police will capture the woman and she prepares to surrender, when her husband - now laying on the ground outside - presumed dead, begins stirring. Both husband and wife have hideously disfigured faces from all the CARNAGE! Then, with their dying movements, they begin Reaching Into Each Other's Pulpy Faces And Grabbing Big Messy Handfuls Of Face And Eating Them.

This was an extremely vivid and unbroken dream. So say you got uninterrupted sleep, but for this. Can't win em all, I suppose.

If somebody held a gun to my head and forced me to plop-out a Mission Statement Of Intent For Psychology Graduate School, it might go something like thus:

"

My interests in psychology are as broad as the field itself, but, as necessity demands, can be narrowed down into three themes: 1. Garden-Variety Depression and Suicide 2. Personal Relationships 2a. Attraction, Libido and Gender and 3. Stress and Coping.

Hence, I am especially fascinated in the intersection of the three: in which dysfunctional libidinous personal relationships and inadequate coping with stress predicate a suicidal depression.

Somewhat Unorthodoxically, I am interested in approaching these interests both from a clinical/applied praxis, and from a research/experiential one.

That is to say, listening to suicidally-depressed people complain about their relationships for 50 hours a week would make me blow my brains out, as would writing papers for 50 hours a week about - and designing - retarded so-called "psych experiments" regarding these people's shitty lives and relationships.

Ideally my professional time would take a "working backwards" approach in which I would test various forms of therapy to see what works for different people, and then write papers about that for the other half of my time.

I am most interested in producing tangible, positive results for actual clients in their actual lives, but I'd rather specialize with a specific type of client (mood disorders and the [many] related balls-of-wax; as opposed to batshit crazy schizo disorders and/or anything so intense it puts you in a PSYCH WARD) and I do not want to have too many clients such that I'm listening to them flap their jaws all day and not getting some peace and quiet writing in my office or going out to lunch with smart people or developing nondysfunctional libidinous relationships of my own.

"

As You can tell, I'm only around a 50% ideal "fit" for both "Academic PhD Research Psych" as well as "Clinical Masters" Psych. There simply doesn't exist a program for what I want to do. And if there did, I'd bet it would be ridiculously, unfairly cutthroat competitive.

Plus I'm not hotshit about Cognitive Neuroscience which is what half of PhD's are all about. (And that's very valid. I'm not begrudging them that whatsoever.)

If the masked, naked muslim holding the gun to my head demanded I write an Admissions Statement to Library School, it might go something like this:

"

This program will prepare me for a solid career in Professional Librarianship and Information Science because it is....erm accredited by the ALA. My Interests in L&IS stem from my interest in Knowledge Itself. I enjoy knowing a little bit about everything and Ideally I would locate myself in errm the mid-level management of a Large, Pan-Discliplinary Academic Library. Or a Superior-Quality Public Library. And not in some underfunded shithole where all they have are a bunch of donated romance and religious paperbacks.

I would also be interested in spearheading the creation of a Library Of Research On Depressed Alcoholics Wot Don't Know How To Interact Socially, if brass tacks were to be mandated. But my preference is to develop Superior-Quality Public (or Academic) Libraries. In fact, I would like to bridge the gap, so to speak, between Public and Academic Libraries.

Also I'm ermaware of the Information Science aspect because Librarians use The Internets to find stuff and help other people find stuff better. And ideally would use all sorts of hot new gadgets and techmology as well. Because I believe that The New Librarian must also be, by definition, An IT Professional.

"

Holy God.

Finally, if I were provoked into writing a 5-min Rough Draft Statement of Intent for Business School:

"

I love Business. President Coolidge once said 'the business of America is business', and I think Walsh College would agree. What Coolidge was getting at is that The Entrepreneurial Spirit was one of the Founding Principles of Amurka. It's actually in the constitution. Businesses provide the high standard of living Americans have come to enjoy. Every organization is essentially a Business. My Cock is a business. Hence it is incumbent upon every american to become educated In Business. I have chosen Your MBA program as the logical conclusion of my belief in this Civic Incumbency, because I'm smart and I get good grades even though Finance is pretty boring and Marketing is the Devil's Handiwork. So I'm going the Management Route because I'm a leader not a follower. I need people working under me, just as I need to direct them and lead My Organization to its Maximum Potential and Make Monay as well as make the world a better place for our children's children.

"

"loneliness may be catching"

Some Troggo M.D., PhD, MPH DDS suggested that knowing lonely people makes You more lonely. You know how I feel about Our Tax Dollars supporting "Research" like this. I would have hoped, at least, it would provoke some interesting blog posts by other bloggers, because I'm too bored to write about it myself.

The only thing worse than a Privileged White Narcissist Smugly Navel-Gazing about Libido and the Excruciation of Troggies is a Privileged White Narcissist Smugly Navel-Gazing about His Experience with Crippling Depression, like That's gonna help anyone. I don't really expect it to, but if it does, GREAT.

The main useful thing to remember about CD is that it's basically the "Common Cold" of "mental health issues", meaning it's not a big deal. It's not actually Crippling. Some people manage to keep up with their lives and not go into the PSYCH WARD. I accept all this. Good for them. Imho, the PSYCH WARD is not really a place I'd want to go because I stereotype them as Prisons where the big creepy Orderlies Prison-Bang You. (But apparently James Taylor had some positive experiences in the P-Ward. Good for him.)

The real problem is when the CD snowballs into other problems, like drinking, drugs, losing your job, losing your family, your home, etc etc etc. That's when the whole ball of wax starts to get crippling, when you're a drunk madman on the streets. What started off so innocently can get pretty ugly.

So yeah. I reiterate: It's within the realm of possibility that You may keep your job, home, and family (but not All the time). But I claim that CD is especially bad for undermining your confidence in INTERVIEWING for NEW jobs, or Advancing in your current career. I might do a PhD experiment on that.

The Tiger Woods thing is the biggest news story since Michael Jackson. I'm almost tired of hearing about it. The reason it's so big is because TW has never had a scandal and he's been squeaky-clean golden boy until now. So we ask ourselves: should celebrities Ever be held-up as Role Models for the Young? It's very obvious which Celebrities are role models only if Guzzling Black Jizz is the kind of Role You aspire to.

This case is especially tricky because it didn't involve anything other than Cheating: no drugs, no booze, no violence, no deaths, no nothing but a simple garden-variety extramarital affair. This Isolation of Cheating is valuable exactly because we cannot "conflate" it with other issues other than TW being really rich and famous. He's not a drunk madman.

So I like to joke that "Everybody Cheats" and so this TW thing is great fodder for me. If Golden Boy can cheat, so can You!

What I take issue with is that TW was cheating on his Classy Swedish Wife with some total Trifling Hoes. That's what boggles my mind. This is not a case of Trading Up - quite the opposite. But maybe when you don't need to Trade Up, then you will Opt Down just for the Bravado of it. I would not know. Maybe the Downage of the Trifling H's provides the exact thrill he wanted: he did it just because he could. Just Because.

Still, I would have preferred that his Conventionally-Attractive Swedish wife cheated on him, the perfect, rich, faithful, blameless Golden Man. Who knows. Maybe she did. But now, unfortunately, that would be moot.

Here's the deal: I'm not an ugly guy. I'm a pretty not-bad looking guy. But I'm not a Conventionally-Attractive Man the way filthy girls like Megan Fox or Fergie or Angelina or Scarlett or jessica simpson or rihanna or Scumdashian or "olivia wilde" or are "Conventionally-Attractive Women." Honestly. Why do people think FERGIE is "Hot." Her face is hideously Scary.

Bottom Line: Me not being Conventionally-Attractive is moot, because I don't really care for "Conventionally-Attractive" Anyway. The vast majority of women I've been attracted-to have been Attractive in Unconventional ways. What I'm getting at: Trying to Refute my Fear that the Unconventionally-Attractive Women I'm attracted to will, for their part, be exclusively attracted only to Conventionally-Attractive men, like say, Team Jacob or Brangelina or something, when "they" "should" be attracted mainly to other Unconventionally-Attractive people like themselves, like myblackself, yawwwwwn.

Yeah, I can say that George Clooney's a pretty attractive and charming man, but I also largely suspect that he is a huge Rake. George Clooney can cheat Tiger Woods under the table. You all know this.

I think the guy I like is Tom Waits. He's been pretty happy with his wife and hasn't felt the need to cheat on her in 30 years of marriage. That level of satisfaction, to me, is ideal. (But Maybe they do have an "Open Marriage." But that's moot, what's important is that they haven't killed each other, and that they obviously L'n'R'n'A each other a fair deal.) Note: Tom Waits is pretty weird-looking, but I would neverever call him ugly, especially so ugly that he shouldn't be able to pull a Woman he's attracted to. And apparently he has, so good for him. Hell no he's not ugly. I think he's a handsome man, aamof.

(Bob Dylan, for his part, is an Obnoxious, Ornery, Wife-Beating, Woman-Hating Little Jewish Asshole who will never be capable of a Mature Relationship. And Leonard Cohen is, by his own admission, too much of a self-deprecating Jewish coward to succeed in a Real Relationship. But I do think LC, with a little more confidence, could handle a RealRel Maturely.)

Because with all this talk about L'n'R, we must never forget that things will never proceed past Square One without some spark of Attraction in there. That's absolutely necessary. L'n'R'n'A they should call it. Sometimes there's L'n'R but no A, and, to the Rational Mind, that's a little disappointing. Then there's the worst thing of all - A with no L'n'R, which characterizes many Stereotypical Personal Relationships.

I've always wanted to say that I hate that stupid commercial on the radio where it's like "So you've decided to start blogging. Good for you! But then you ran into your creepy x-boyfriend at the coffee shop..." and he talks like matthew mcconaghey and slurps his coffee and ogles "hot girls" at the beach and you make the mistake of re-hooking-up with him and complaining about it. I would Luv to read the blog of that BITCH. I think I can just leave this description as it is and you can imagine how The Sibhod feels about this commercial. You've had to have heard it. They play it on all radio stations every day for the past 6 months. It's perniciously ubiquitous.

Have pir8ed the discography of Isengard (Fenriz black metal solo project) because I like Fenriz-as-a-Person and hope that maybe - in some obtuse way - he's creating/ed music that's a bit more compelling than modern Darkthrone. Not saying that you can never be in the mood for Modern Darkthrone, though. Still a great drum sound, Ted's still a great singer, etc.

I Might have to push back the release date of the New Hit Single about a month or so, but no more. Things are simply about a month behind schedule. But rest assured this is not because of laziness or procrastination, and the "extra" month will fully serve the purpose of producing a better-written and better-sounding Hit Single. It will be Epic, Raw, Grim, Really Real, Profound, Perfect and Straightforward.

I'm gonna try to re-focus on Terse Prose in the Sibhod beginning in the New Year, but, right now, I kinda like not being Terse when I don't feel like it.

I have an Econ Exam today and had a Time Management fail yesterday in which I failed to finish my (ungraded) Accting "homework" AND to do "adequate" studying for the Econ Exam. I place some blame on the instructor for being rather unorganized and for wasting so much time on easy sections that he has to FLY through the complicated, advanced sections and just cram them in. This is worthwhile subject material but he needs to take TIME on it, and him rushing thru it is turning me OFF to the material, interestingly enough.

I used to really hate the guy and now I still don't love him, but, more than anything, I feel pity for him for being a sad, angry, lonely old man. He's cripplingly depressed but doesn't know it. "Ironically" I'm having him again for Econ 2 next term because he alone teaches 90% of the Econ 2 sections.

Mentioning this is useless because the absurd generosity of his Extra Credit System more than outweighs his Unpleasant Personality and Interest-Confounding Teaching Style. In other words, I could actually get a Zero for this exam and Still get an A in the class easily. Lots of people flew thru the exam in 10 minutes for this very reason. But I read and answered the questions thoughtfully like a Good Student. My point is, topics like Classical vs Keynesian Economics, and Govt Fiscal Policy seem like big important topics that are worth more than 15 minutes of lecturing; and I'm curious as to what an Economist who isn't miserably cripplingly depressed would have to say about them.

I admit it. I stole the whole "Black" pseudonym-prefix from Black Francis, such that I could be called "Black Kenneth." But it succeeds on so many other levels too!

Stereotypes are fascinating and Maddening. Everyone is at different points on the Nonstereotypical - Stereotypical Spectrum, that's the only way I can put it.

What a lot of Broads have trouble understanding is that when a man Ejaculates on your Skin (as opposed to Inside your Rectum, Mouth, Nostril, or Pussy), it's a sign of contempt/disrespect: "I just Pwned that Broad." So, Broads, remember that next time you're getting Shot-on.

Well that's about it. This is an example of me doing a Sibhod when I'm not in a horrible mood. The last few have been like that, actually. You know. Hovering around a good 5.7 out of 10 I'd say.

Your homework for next time:

Watch Seinfeld every day
Put Montreal Steak Seasoning on everything
Start Your own Blog and/or Solo Project
Don't Go Out to the Bar
Stay Celibate
Quit Facebook
Go to bed no later than 9:30 pm
Pull Up Your God Damn Pants
Be Patient with Autistic People
Treat everyone as if they were Individuals Dying Of Cancer

And, as always, use Your Conventionally-Attractive Friends as My Prostitutes, and get me an interview for A Substantial Job.

And Don't Be A Stupid Nigger.

GYNOCIDE

The Sibhod is always changing. The Shark Is Alive. Given that, I can firmly say that I am shifting towards decreasing the navel-gazing, but there's still a little bit left to go. Come on. Let's keep it going until New Years Resolution Time.

This is the first b-day I've had where it really didn't feel like a b-day (monday). It kinda "snuck up" on me and I didn't even realize what day it was. So that's not bad, but I'm dreading when the feeling finally sinks in that "I AM 20-SEVEN YEARS OLD". Seeing that SEVEN really scares the shit outta me. At least I don't LOOK that old. Do I? I can still think 20-One-Year-Olds are purty. Can't I?

But yeah. Action packed-day, none of it b-day related: peepeed rich'n'yellow in a cup at 6:30 am, going to do my monthly meeting with my Officer, got an Acct Exam tomorrow to start studying for today, try to be ready to go to sleep @ 8and30 pm. This is how you do thangs when you're 20-SEVEN.

I remove my birthday from Myspace so I don't get people messaging/texting/calling me. This is a particularly brilliant passive-aggressive move which I'm especially proud of and I'd encourage others to deploy: "Oh! You won't know what my bday is unless you heard me mention it obtusely, OR you're a Reader of the Sibhod, and then you marked it on Your Google Calendar!" But I'm fine with that, because

A. I don't like Relying on Myspace/Facebook to remember people's bdays and I rarely leave bday comments myself because they're usu offensive

B. I don't like getting reminders from people I haven't talked to in 6,000,000 years that today I am 6,000,000 Years Old.

Win-Win. That's how I do it.

Last night was a first. I went to bed practically at 8 pm and was hoping to get good sleep. I still had a really weird dream, BUT: It was not explicitly terrifying, AND I did not keep waking up pell-mell through the night. The dream was long and my sleep felt relatively better than usual. See, I put an "X" on my Chart if my night's sleep was unfreshingly interrupted. This night I just put half an "X". Blatant Restfulness Kicked Up A Notch, F.T.W.

I'll give another shout-out to A PhD-Boy at Vaunted Bourgeois University who unoffensively suggested that I might like Henry Miller. AndYou know, I probably would. Even if he is "sex-positive" and I am "sex-negative", I think we could find some common ground. Just because he was so filthy and "Iconoclastic." I will never, ever stop worshipping Bukowski, mind, but I need a new Bukowski, one who does not drink. Bukowski is still one of the greatest People of all time, but he owed the Entirety of Who He Was to Alcohol, and I can no longer use that kind of person as a Role Model.

Now here's the head-scratcher on everybody's minds: Why doesn't TOM WAITS write BOOKS?

Nick Cave writes a book here and there, but I hear they're nothing amazing.

And I'm not sure I would like Leonard Cohen's novels. Weren't they big Henry Miller rip-offs anyway?

I would like to read Bob Dylan's autobiography, mind. That actually sounds interesting.

But I still got 5 Harry Potter books to get through.

Country Music is Definition Ridiculous. I was sitting there in a Family Restaurant and they were playing modern country music and the song was talking about some dude bringing a woman home where she "threw her black dress on the floor" and they "made love all night long." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. And all this is yawnably typical. Tequila making your clothes fall off, Save a horse ride a cowboy, Redneck Woman, all these country songs are absolutely Filthy, and millions of people Luv It.

I thought it was kinda "subversive" how these filthy lyrics "sneak in" underneath the totally vanilla music. It made me want to use it for comedy, take it to the Xtreme: like make my own vanilla country song but the lyrics would be even MORE out there, like blatantly racist and misogynistic. (Or at least Quadruple X-rated.) Like more blatant than blatant, using actual hate-language if necessary. Then you play the songs in public and see if anyone notices or cares.

(See, lotsa people love David Allan Coe, but right off the bat, he proudly niches himself into "Outlaw Country". No. I just want fucking Brad Paisley to write even more filthy lyrics about him spurting on some broad's forehead and then putting on his cowboy boots and leaving.)

I need to work on my cover letter. I use too many cliches like "self-motivated" and "multitasking" and "superior communication and problem-solving skills."

So I went to this "Alcohol Education Class." The guy who did it was the Chief Probation Officer and he was actually very nice and smart. I was impressed, and pleasantly surprised. I was terrified that there would be a panel of MADD mothers screaming at us about what horrible, evil people we were; but nothing of the sort. At any rate, I don't think the Class really forced anyone to "make up their minds" about whether or not they wanted to drink any more. But I was just thankful that we were treated with some dignity.

So Durkheim famously suggested in his famous book "Suicide" that Suicide is not entirely individualized and that there are some macrosociological factors. I would like to "investigate the intersection" of where the private meets the public. Because nobody's saying Durkheim said there weren't any psychological factors at work.

Oh Fancy Christ. I'm hearing that country song about the "black dress hittin' the floor, all I can think about is gettin' you home" RIGHT NOW.

When people talk about "doing it all night long", they don't literally mean ALL. NIGHT. LONG. Like 8 straight hours of PIV Boning. People don't Bone for 8 hours straight. Not even J Univ girls Exploring Tantra for the first time. This is all a Media Lie. People do it for 5 minutes tops like they always do/did, and then the man is shaken from his stupor several hours later to find he's inside the nympho B again for another completely unremarkable 5 minutes. Repeat that cycle until the man cannot perform any more. That's "All Night Long" - the reality is just as ludicrous as the fiction.

All Women like it when men are macho and call women "Broads" because that's what the Powerful Executives on "Mad Men" do. But I don't think All Women realize the Gravitas of what it really means when Men authentically consider all women to be "broads." I personally like the term because it's shorter than saying "trifling ho", but it packs the same punch: This broad is insignificant, weak, stupid, trifling, wrong, and Definition Undeserving of Respect.

All Women: "Lighten Up, Classwar! It's just a really good show, and I sowhatifmaybe I do get tingly when guys call me broad sometimes! But NOT like what you say!"

I fall for the exact same fallacy that "Alpha PUAs" do: they put themselves in this Didactically Superior Position, where they KNOW things about All Women, and All Women Don't Know these things about themselves.

That's all it is. That's the whole crux of the PUA thing: men convince themselves that there is this Scientific Evolutionary Rational Process that All Women follow, but All Women either don't know that, or they would always deny it. I think this is a slippery slope to Rape - by claiming that Rape doesn't really exist - but what the hell do I know, I'm just A Man.

O WOEIZ ME.

I wouldn't stop you from giving this post Sibhod-Of-The-Year Award.

Despite being this Narcissistic, I don't really view myself as "A God" as much as I do "A Prophet". A mouthpiece for An/The Atheistic Gods.

"Atheistic Gods" Jives with my "Ambivalence" tip quite nicely. For example, saying "Bless You" when it's just a polite thing to do. Or, if someone's going into the hospital and they ask you to "pray for them", you just say the damn prayers not because you're not an atheist/agnostic/RationalHumanist, but because you want everything to go smoothly in the hospital. This is just simple common sense.

"Your standards for physical attractiveness have been molded unrealistically by the media", I hear all the Normal Women groaning. No they have not, I respond. "Well, what about all your ridiculous Tests then." Those have nothing to do with the media, I respond. It's totally subjective. Very few Readers might even remember than I used to be absolutely obsessed with a woman who was objectively really pretty Ugly, aamof.

The other day I looked at a young woman with a Profoundly Huge Jay Leno Reverse-Everest Chin, and I found her Perfectly, Passably, J-onably, Slobberonably, maybe even L'n'R-ably Attractive. That's my point exactly: it's not just the Chin - It's the Entire Face; it can't be separated into discrete parts and evaluated on a piecemeal basis like that. Some other broad might have a huge chin and be hideous. You gotta step back and take a good look at the Big Picture. Be a Monist / Wholist.

Welcome to the Real World, Baby. I was trying to do my homework in one of miraculously-available "Open Study" rooms the other day and this kid was having a total, terrible tourette's spazzout. Had to be Tourettes: He was making the "HRNGH!" noise, with twitches, some incoherent muttering to himself, some giggling, and he even belched inappropriately. If he was On Meds, they were painfully not working. It was honestly kind of distracting as I struggled to crunch my numbers. Later I felt horribly sorry for him: What kind of person - how saintly, how physically unattractive - would a person have to be to enter willingly into a mature adult Relationship with this guy? The extremity of the Tourettes would be a total dealbreaker for me. And, to top it all off, he wasn't awfully Physically Attractive. If you ever needed to get on a Thankfulness Tip, sit in a room with this guy.

I suspect that when one has Official "B.O.", that it's just not simply normal Natural Human Sweaty Odour. It's something completely different. I once approached a young man who looked like he had decent hygiene and then I smelled, from him, an Odour I thought no living human body could produce. More to be thankful for this time of year.

Attraction Itself is a broad interest of mine. The rub that makes Attraction so hard to Study Academically is that

1. We don't know why we're attracted to what we're attracted to

2. Many times, we don't even really know WHAT we're attracted to.

A more-than-useful level of Controversy ensues, such that being Attraction, PhD would not be fun. It would probably even be easier to try to Appease your own ornery sense of attraction, and just regard the whats, hows, and whys moot. Leave those to the trve masochists.

What the world needs to understand is, when I want to take a Big Nap, not even Hot Action is gonna stand in my way.

What some guys have trouble understanding is that when A Woman, within 2 minutes of meeting You, grabs Your Junk and starts making all these overtures about Wanting to Have PIV Sex with You, that's not a good, clean thing. That means she's a Head Case, And that she has done the same thing with many other guys. And likely succeeded with some of the sleazier ones.

I got an idea for Comedy where a person - man or woman, and each possibility lends itself to a different tenor of humour - is such a Huge Butt-Slut that they joke, when yet another person is about to enthusiastically put their Peepee up there, "Be careful - Anything you put up there, you might not get back!"

Kind of a play off the infamous "Vagina Dentata" trope vis-a-vis flesh-rendering viri.

http://news.google.com/news/story?ncl=http://www.geek.com/articles/news/facebook-photos-cause-woman-to-lose-medical-leave-benefits-20091123/&hl=en

Maybe I'm just operating off the assumption that I've ALREADY cost myself a Good, Real Job by ever creating the Sibhod, so there's no turning back now. Fine. But this story gave me a few questions:

1. How hardcore do Authorities hack into the "private" sections of your public profiles

2. What's the Work Flow Process / Chain of Events that leads to this investigation being opening and an IT Professional getting the dirt

3. Canadians get full-time sick leave for having Crippling Depression? I should become a canadian citizen, and never have to worry about finding a Real Job!

(Semi-Unrelated Tangent: It's kinda Wrong that not-being-a-racist is so tied up with White, Privileged, Smug, Bourgeois Education and that sometimes some people think they can't deny the one without denying the other. Not that Education is wrong. But, say, you could be educated in the Hard Sciences at a NonBourge School and still somehow be a racist. Or like me, for example, where you're educated in All Things Soft and Jewish at a very privileged, smug, bourgeois Institution Of Education and STILL be a Racist Hick. WHAT A WORLD.)

No, I would not consider myself AntiAmerican at all, because I am SO HARDCORE on Freedom of Speech. This does not mean I can't be against insurance companies doing private investigation on people.

And to base one's (nonmedical) judgement to withdraw benefits based on Pictures when we're talking about Crippling Depression, well, then, these people don't know the nature of the beast. People can hide it really well, and sometimes they do get the good day once in a while. Sure, there's plenty of people who have Worse Crippling Depression who don't have any friends to have fun with, or some people who don't get good days, and plenty of people who were never awarded any benefits at all.

And just to get the "should people with Crippling Depression even be able to take paid sick leave" controversy out of the way: Probably yes. Lots of asterisks. Crippling depression makes people work less productively is the main thing it does. But it doesn't make them unable to work. So uh...I'm not sure how that should be compensated. Where crippling depression really is a big problem is when you're trying to FIND a job. Because it makes you a real bad job seeker and interviewer and prevents you from ever getting a job in the first place. So, Policy Recommendation: They should extend Unemployment Benefits to Discouraged Workers because often Workers' Discouragement dovetails with Crippling Depression.

Or the gov't should just put prozac in tap water like fluoride.

The underlying problem of course is Stigma around crippling depression. In the US that stigma takes the form of people looking at you like you're crazy if you suggest people with CD should get paid sick leave. I suppose in a more ridiculous country like Sweden they might simply nod their swedish heads and say "ok. Take a few months off of work and get some treatment. No Big Deal!" and not lump all these character-judgements into it like us Macho Men in the US do: "Shut the fuck up and grow a pair and stop whining, the world's not fair, get used to it or kill yourself, you fucking weak little pussyass woman."

And that's about it. As a person who has "Suffered" the (bullshit, LiberalJewrunMedia-invented) "Problem" of "Crippling Depression", I can say all these things. Basically it makes you not-at-the-top-of-your-game, and you are no good to no one. But there are ways to deal with it. I find that quitting drinking, using Happy Flashcards, and getting enough Sleep has helped tremendously, especially that first one. And I fully accept that different Treatments will work better for different Sad Sacks. Get Yourself a light box, I don't care.

I have an Acct Exam today and I did not feel like studying. So I decided to study the shortest amount of time that could even be called "Studying." Like 45 minutes to an hour. And I will finish up today right before the exam. I'd feel a little better if the guy gave any extra credit, but he does not. He is so straightforward that he gives no extra credit and the only basis for gradable points are the 4 exams. But he does curve the exams, so that's not too bad. Real Straightforward, Genuine article guy. Irish Catholic, Catholic boys' school, large family, pretty stubbornly conservative, but he's got a great chi.

Been sleeping better by the smallest gradual increments. So I am cautiously optimistic for the future. Of sleep.

Recently I've been wanting to grow my hair out longer but it is in a horrendous awkward stage right now where I am tempted to chop it all off. There's only one way to get through this one.

I've said this before and I'll say it again and again: You cannot Fuck Wit James Taylor. If you even try to, you're just showing your own ignorance. I'd like to see JT one day in a venue that's not like Pine Knob/DTE. For example, Fox Theatre was IDEAL for Leonard Cohen. It would have been Ideal for Bob Dylan if I had been cool enough to go to that. (Thankful that Bob has his "Never Ending Tour"!!)

Ideally I would have a computer newer than 8 years old and a nice 160 GB iPod. Ideally I will get a nice new laptop by March 2010. How's that for planning. Maybe I should hold off on the mp3 player until then, and then just take the ipod plunge. Although you cannot listen to probably more than 10 gb of new music at any one time, I like having a Large Shuffle Sample.

I cannot listen to albums anymore because

1. most albums suck and are too long and boring

2. slight adult adhd.

So, shuffling is Ideal, and, if you're a band and simply MUST release an album, then do a damn EP.

TEASER: The KC black metal solo project is actually entertaining the idea of releasing an EP in 2010. You have been warned. (this will be after the Hit Single which I ideally will release before New Years.)

I do not hate All Albanians. I just had a great moment with an Albanian Girl. She was really pretty: wore nice glasses, had some face-acne, a little accent, did not talk loud/obnoxiously, wore tasteful clothing, Annnnd she had a SMOKING little body on HER! I saved her day by showing her how to do "hanging indents" for MLA-style works cited page, which, I admit, was a real good save on my part, because I didn't really remember how to do this but managed to remember even as I was sneaking peaks at her beautiful face and body, trying not to get too excited. I actually felt Libidinous!!!!!!!

"IT'SSS A-LIIIIIIIIIIVVVVE!"

So the day's off to a good start by 8 am. I can live with this.

I think Scientists say that Men's Libido is strongest at the beginning of the day, and then wanes as the day grows longer. I would definitely identify with that. If you think you're gonna get a piece of this after 6 pm You've got another thing comin'.

Why were the Germans called "The Bosch" in ww2? I could very easily look this up but I figured I'd just pose the question.

When I did my first 8tracks mix, I threw in an epic 14 minute In The Woods... song, but for some reason it was slowed down to maybe 70% of the speed, but it was still listenable. So now the song was 20 minutes long and even MORE epic. That was a very pleasant surprise, and I would like to do slow versions of other songs. This song was already epic to begin with, so I'm thinking you could get a better Epic Return on The Original with maybe a semi-epic 6-7 minute song. I'm gonna do it.

Can't some Academic Scientists do a study with some statistics and graphs and then boil it down to the meat and potatoes and say "This is the single most in-demand and long-term stable career there is, i.e., change your career to this right now."

Is it Nursing? Is it physical therapy? Is it casino croupiers? Is it Systems Analysts? What is it? High School Teachers? It's certainly not Librarians or MBAs. Actually it might be MBAs.

(Although Being a Real American Entrepreneur is a good career for any economy at any time.)

Who the hell knows. They say that economists are notorious for not being able to reach conclusions. So what does that say about the rest of us uninformed Joe Schmoes.

Things have been kind of busy around here and I have found myself getting irritable, nervous, etc. I will be glad to get home to the peace and quiet and maybe even 8:30pm bedtime.

FMLA, baby, FMLA. We need to learn the LAW.

Thanksgiving can be a difficult time of year. End of December is even worse. It's not a surprise that people drink a lot during this time.

There is a conventionally-attractive woman who is being surprisingly tenderly consoled by a, surprise, rather conventional, non-beta looking man, and automatically I'm judging from the look on her face that it's not doing anything for her and she really wants to be boning down with somebody who looks more like Ben Wallace and nothing's gonna stop her and this is gonna be a trainwreck and someone's gonna get arrested.

But maybe those are just automatic cognitive distortions.

That new House episode was great, where the supergenius was miserable because he was so smart so he Robotripped every day to reduce his IQ and be happy with a troggy, then once he stopped tripping, he said, Her IQ is closer to that of a GIBBON than to me, what I do with her should be considered Bestiality. That was just great. Of course it's oversimplifying things for dramatic purposes, but still. Didn't you ever wish you could make yourself More Troggy. Just Robotrip every day. I don't know why I don't do that.

I'm one of those rare types that is probably not as smart as they think they are. If that were true, that would suck balls.

I'm A Prophet because I channel Profound Truths many times a day; the Sibhod can barely contain them all.

I cannot find a Phil Collins Greatest Hits Album that is not just one big unseparated mp3. How did this become the predominant PC torrent/rar? Can somebody point me in a good direction?

I am so going to see Antichrist today. I am Definition Excited. I have not been this excited for a movie in a while. You'll recall I saw INLAND EMPIRE FIVE TIMES in the theatre.

Only Tom Waits could getawaywith writing a song like "House Where Nobody Lives" and have it sound authentically sentimental and not trite, kitschy, etc. In fact it sounds very sentimental in-a-good-way and can even bring a tear to this cynic's eye.

Did you know, that despite the supersaturation of oversexualization of everything in the L.J.-Run Media/Marketing, that the average person has, as an average number of average PIV-sex partners per Annum, between One and ZERO? I should really find the citation for that one. It was semi scientific. Like Kinsey but not Kinsey. Could have even come out of Kinsey's vaunted S Research Institute at Indiana. ONE or ZERO. Or maybe it's as "much" as Two. But still. For a Man who felt threatened by the idea of All Women having 6,000,000 Black Sex Partners A Day, this is good news. People are never getting Laid as much as You think. And it's also reassuring to be able to view myself as "Normal." Yes, I am Normal, believe it or not.

I do not care about getting Laid at ALL. The real benefit of having an LnR-able FaceBodyObject around is that I'm simply Ridiculously PRODUCTIVE. I get a lot of stuff done efficiently and effortlessly. That is 60,000,000 times more valuable than getting LAID -or even Hmoa! I can still be somewhat productive without the LnRableFaceBodyObject, but the productivity is in this case is markedly more begrudged and less enthusiastic.

I should walk around Sterling Heights with an "I HATE ALBANIANS" sandwich-board. Although "Die Hard With A Vengeance" gets old pretty quickly, that one scene never will.



LARS VON TRIER: "ANTICHRIST"



"Yeppers"! I did do this one up royally. I don't really feel like doing a thoughtful, publishable, bloggable, or remotely readable review like a writer-for-hire might do. I'll just jerk-off Some Unorganized Thoughts:

LVT is so misogynistic it's scary. It's scary that he actually might think this way, and it's even more scary when you find yourself entertaining the horrifying idea that he might be right. LVT has always said he wants to make movies that stick with you, like a pebble in your shoe, and this time around, the pebble is: "WOMEN ARE PURE EVIL. WOMEN ARE SATAN'S WHORES."

I cannot say this is my favourite LVT, but...he still does a great job and everyone in the world should still see it. "Antichrist" only strengthens my belief that LVT is on the very short list of Greatest Living Filmmakers.

The movie Sometimes seems kinda slow as you watch it, a bit draggy or boring perhaps, but it definitely stays with you afterwards.

I think I can say without spoiling too much that this movie is directly, explicitly influenced by Tarkovsky, and LVT even Officially Dedicates it to Tarkovsky. Fine by me; Tarkovsky made beautiful and thoughtful movies (albeit slowwww and boring), and LVT has done the same here, "borrowing" Tarkovsky "trademarks" - "sculpting in time", if you will - of long, dreamlike, mysticallike shots of wind rustling through forests, cabins, fields, nature, mist, etc. Very effective, and quite the Opposite of the "AntiScenery" of "Dogville" and "Manderlay". He also does not use the super-grainy film quality of "DITD" or "Breaking The Waves" or "The Idiots". "Antichrist" looks very classy, very artsy, at times flirting somewhat tongue-in-cheekly with the "obnoxiously artsy". e.g., the Prologue.

Let's just say I had a big shiteating grin on my face from the very beginning of the movie. Yeah, so it may be a bit of an Homage to Tarkovsky, but it's still got LVT's style smeared all over it.

There are a number of Graphic scenes in this movie which have caused some controversy along the lines of say "Brown Bunny" or what-have-you. If you want spoilers you can find them very easily, like on the AV Club. But it was the scene with Charlotte Gainsbourg in Chapter 4 that may very likely make you Puke, and, at the very least, even describing it will squick the hell out of You. Kctmoap found it to be Really Over The Top.

Gainsbourg is a Waifish Woman to begin with, but in this movie she looks like she has a damn eating disorder. YMMV re this. You might want to beat the shit out of LVT for being so typically heavy-handedly misogynistic, or, like me, you'll eat it up. Yes, she is pretty Bjorkish. LVT Probably would have used Bjork if he hadn't traumatized her into basically retiring from acting with "DITD." I wouldn't be surprised if he similarly ends Gainsbourg's acting career with this one. Good God what a woman-hater.

Perhaps he should have called it "AntiWoman"!

The concept of "Gynocide" appears in the movie. I thought I had invented this whole idea back in 2005 when I came up with Mr Weiss's Master Plan of Exterminating All Women From The Face Of The Earth, and I cleverly called it "Gynocide." So imagine my surprise to see this word, if not the exact same idea, appear in LVT's Movie. He connects it with Mediaeval Witch-Hunts and Women-Persecution by Christians. So it may actually be a legit term used by historians/theologians/scholars. I dunno.

I let him get away with all of this women-"hating" because his is a self-reflecting misogyny, and it's really less of women-"hating" than it is women-Fearing. Trier-as-a-person is very truly torn up by fears and doubts regarding men, women, humanity, human nature, and existence; and he puts this torment onto the screen in a way that will scare the shit out of you and stir Your own deepest insecurities about these same topics. He's far from being a misogynistic in that typical way: alpha chauvinistic male. No, he's painfully aware of his insecurities about People and Women, and he expresses this profoundly In Film in a way you definitely don't see every day.

Everything's Basically all on Charlotte Gainsbourg. She is the driving force of this movie, and Willem Dafoe is just along for the ride. While that sounds like a Gender Role Reversal, there's also strict gender role Orthodoxy in a very old-school way: like, superoldschool: women are witches, women are "the weaker vessel"; women are hysterical, insane, susceptible to possession, satan's concubines, women are hell on earth, women are the most evil, terrifying thing on the Planet, and thus Men must exterminate them ruthlessly. That's the kind of old-school terrifying misogyny this movie revels in.

This is the kind of movie that will turn Atheists into Religious, just to pray that what LVT's suggesting is not true.

All the skeletons will be falling out of all the closets with this one, and if you weren't insecure/uncomfortable about Sex before, You will be now.

Yeah, it's a little bit Blue Velvety too, consciously so in at least one scene.

And I think it might even be A Grower too!

Verdict: Not as Classic as "Dogville" or "D.I.T.D.", but still some solid-ass LVT; Still Two-Plus Thumbs Up and Recommended to All. Fun For the Whole Family.

There was a young, nonugly woman in the theatre watching it. I expected she was just waiting for one of her skinny-jeaned Bearded Artist Paramours to show up, but no. She just went to watch this movie alone of her own Damn Accord. "Why is that so shocking, Classwar," the Feminists say. Because as a Misogynist who doesn't get out much, I've never seen a woman do this before, let alone at a movie like "ANTICHRIST." Good for her! I probably should have gotten her number uh?

This movie will make you feel like You have some Real Big Issues and that You are more Fucked-Up than you really actually are. So, yeah, LVT succeeds with the whole "Pebble In The Shoe" thing once again.

I just downloaded BUZZ BALLADS. I can't believe it's taken me so long to remember to do this. Staind! Live! Counting Crows! Third Eye Blind! Tonic! Fuel! LIFEHOUSE! You know you're tingling by now. So just do yourself a favour and download it too. RIGHT NOW.

That's all for to-day. Have a Happy Thanksgiving, don't get arrested for Drunk Driving, and be grateful you don't have Tourettes or whatever horrifying madness Lars "Von" Trier has.

SUCK MY SEX, BITCH

Good afternoon to You All. This Sibhod is somewhat lacking in Cohesiveness if not in Unpredictability. But I've been somewhat bizay and I have a terrible headache, so You will have to take what You can get.

"Don't Hate Women, Hate Society", as the pimps and the playas often like to say.

Men and women are trained by society to hate each other and to view each other as The Enemy. I can't count all the people who simply have A Big Fundamental Problem with All Members of The Opposite Gender. It's not just men hating women, it's also women hating men. It's valid - but kinda unfortunate - that, all-around, men and women just do not know how to interact with each other As Human Beings. I sure don't. But that's my point. You cannot getawaywith treating The Opposite Gender As Humans exactly because Gender is rammed down our throats so hardcore, such that we are then forced to "Need-To-Learn-The-Foreign-Language -Of-How-To-Seduce-The-Others(r)", because you have to pass initiation into The Esoteric Sex Club.

All Men claim to hate All Women (annoying, womanly), even though they sometimes claim to love Pounding Pussy. So All Men resent thit that which they Love Pounding is Embodied Within The Enemy That They Hate. All Women claim to hate All Men (boorish, caddish, heartbreakers), but will eagerly get jizzencrusted by the Fun Charming Man who pours enough Booze into (All) Them (r).

Can't people just be straightforward? The Sex Game vis-a-viz Gender is not only as Nonstraightforward as it gets, but it's also totally fucking stupid and gay and evil and unnatural and unevolutionary and irrational and retarded and unfun and wrong.

I started watching "Mr Smith Goes To Washington." It was pretty good. Good writing. It's impossible not to like Jimmy Stewart. I might get into a phase of watching "real old classics" that I'd always prejudged as being "too boring and old." Sure, I didn't feel like watching all of "Mr Smith" because it was too long, but, overall, I feel favourably towards the Film.

In Dragon Quest 8 there is an arrogant little prick named Prince Charmles who is intentionally characterised as the most annoying little prick on the planet. Little faggot shit. If King Trode lets Princess Medea marry this little bastard, I'm gonna be pissed. "Charmless"'s sense of entitlement is preposterously ludicrous. I want to beat the shit out of him.

If your Parents start complaining about you living in their basement at age 40, tell them you're not even contributing to the Unemployment problem, because as a "Discouraged" worker, you're not even calculated into the Available Labour FORCE. You're "Structurally Unemployed." (Yes, I'm aware that Discouraged Workers are not actually Unemployed, even Structurally. But You see what I mean.) Then brutally critique their resumes and tell them to go back to school and change their careers. If all else fails, get mad, scream something about people Drinking Themselves To Death, and break a nice chair.

No, I'm not speaking from personal experience, since I don't get a hard time for living in the basement at age 40.

Well, I've been saving for at least a month and I still only have 5 dollars in my Hooker Fund. So keep talkin' to those Slutty friends of yours and I'll pay them 5 dollars for what they would have done for free. Win-win.


toothpastefordinner.com

Toothpaste for Dinner has been really funny lately. Or maybe I just haven't read it for a while. But that guy Drew is fun-ny. I actually like Drew so much, I'll pay him the respeck of not insulting his hipster wife because apparently he likes and respects her. Maybe he knows something I don't.

Who else gets the Mad Mondays? I found myself trudging along worrying "I have no passion for anything in life, no joie de vivre, no motivation to put forth any effort, I don't get-off on anything, I'm catatonic," when I realized it was just monday, and that I'd probably feel better after some lunch, some dragonquest, and a solid nap. So that's the plan, man.

So in the 3 month hiatus I took from Twitter, the Twitter Governing Body reduced the number of Tweetable characters from 160 to 140. As if is wasn't challenging enough to be that perfect blend of Clever, Edgy, Sarcastic, Ironic, Postmodern, Glib and Funny in 160 Chars. But, I'm a fan of terseness, so I guess this is a good thing.

Still. I will still hate Twitter until the day comes where I can use it to get me a Real Bigboy Job. Till then, it's useless. And womanly.

I sympathize with alcoholics. You know why alcoholics drink? It's very simple. They want to escape their horrible jobs and horrible lives. Didn't we already go over this? So, I am thankful I have nothing horrible in my life to want to escape from.

Would it be cool if I started naming names and saying stuff like "Firstname M.I. Lastname (SS#) of StreetAddress, BF, Egypt, is a Racist Rapist and a Total Asshole when I met them @ Specific Place on the Night of Date, Year."

Or "So-and-So is a Huge Slut because she got sloppy drunk and gave it up So easily'n'enthusiastically to So-and-So2 at Place on mm/dd/yyyy, and then later she had CumCrust on her makeup for like a full hour afterwards before she finally noticed it and washed it off."

Like Libelous - but true - stuff? I dunno. Who am I really trying to provoke here?

It would truly be kinda funny, but more trouble than I'm willing to deal with right now.

Maybe I don't even really want a Mousey Libraryey Dykey Prude I Like And Respect, I just want to earn the goddam privilege of having my Own Independent House and the right to take a nap in it whenever I feel like it. That sounds unfuckwithable. Not the most social person over here anyway. I don't have an extraordinary amount of "needs" in that Dep't..

Christopher Hitchens can be a real funny guy - smart, decent, funny, charming, good writer, charismatic/colourful - but I would Never want to live with him, and I would Never want to S his D. That is how I'm Smart. Like a Man, and not like Women: Men's Natural Enemy.

So I'm thinking I could save some money by accepting the fact that I could probably live with the "drum machine" capabilities of a casio keyboard, rather than getting both a keyboard And a drum machine. That's how we Economize in Michigan(tm).

I am going to invent a new kind of "gentleman's club" which isn't so seedy and obnoxious and misogynistic and trashy. There would be no poles or dancing or DJs or alcohol. A bouncer would muscle-out any Stereotypical Stripper-Patronizing Meatheads. You would simply go into a rather neutral, clerical/office type setting and pay an attractive woman to grind on your lap for a few minutes, and she would not be dressed as a "Stereotypical Stripper." ENTREPRENEURSHIP WIN.

Mr Weiss was doing "Alpha" before the PUAs even had a word for it.

Wot's the deal with those Emo Music Montages in House? Is that supposed to be ironic? Or authentically sentimental? And I actually think it's the latter. So Odd. They actually played the version of Jeff Buckley singing that other guy's song. And I think they may have even played John Mayer once.

John Mayer is one of my guilty pleasures. Jack Johnson is even worse.

Our bodies are fragile, weak machines. It's a miracle we can even get them to last the whole day long. Eating, breathing, moving around, BMs, sleeping. So much going on there.

I'm gonna make the incendiary argument that Most Rel'ship Difficulties come from people subconsciously clinging to gender roles. The man cheats on his girlyfriend because she's too much of a trifling girlygirl, and beats her because he's too much of a macho man. Or she cheats on him because she wants a machoer man who beats'n'cheats on her more. It never occurs to either party to do things that aren't strictly gender-appropriate: Women don't want to watch football, Men don't want to go shopping or talk about feelings. Etc etc etc. (Note: I am SO not arguing that breaking gender stereotypes in those stupid stereotypical ways - women watching football etc - will solve any problems. Wait for it...)

I argue that even if genderrole-transgression did cross people's minds, they'd deride it in a disgusted tone, but they'd really deep down be too Scared to do it.

I guess I'm not making any Policy Recommendations here. And I'm certainly not pointing my finger. I'm just making the observation that people Clinging Frightfully to Gender Stereotypes is a Sad Truth which is Intertwined with Dysfunctional Rel'Ships.

I try to break the cycle by "pretending" I'm gay just to ruffle some troggy's feathers.

Friday, baby. Unfortunately, "Antichrist" stops playing on Thursday. Can You believe I've never actually seen a Trier movie in the theatre? Worse, can you believe that I actually remember seeing "Dogville" on the Marquis for months but I never actually went to see it because I wasn't In Luv with LVT at that time?

Here's something else You've never thought about, i.e., I'm the first person to have this unique thought: You can test to see if you really "like-like" or have "libido" for someone if the idea of Making Out with their Fat, Disgusting, Porcine, Pimply, Pizzaey FACE appeals to you in any way. Think of the Face; the Face Trumps All. It's the Trump Body part which actually is all-or-nothing. For example, You were never really "into" someone if you didn't like their ridiculous FACE. Face Don't Lie. I don't know How much harder can I swing that sledgehammer. If you can't enthusiastically slobber all over somebody's Offensive, Default-Repellant FacePiece, then your "feelings" for them were fraudulent.

I've said over and over again that I don't like how The Twitter Form reinforces "Girly" Glibness. Wouldn't you rather read a Blog with a string of glib statements? That hopefully are less bound by text-message grammar?

There is a guy in the Trve Norwegian Black Metal Band Taake whose name is THURZUR. Thirsty Thurzur, I call him. It's because Taake is so pure, so ingenuous, so really real, that he can getawaywith calling himself Thurzur and keep a straight (grim, white-painted) face. Besides. Everybody knows Taake is Essentially just the Hoest Solo Project.

Taake does rightfully deserve derision for their "Nazi/Swastika" incident - and Hoest's remark "go suck a Muslim" was in very poor taste - but the "fact" (subjective) is, their music sometimes make you feel like you're 15 again and just discovering Black Metal.

"Are you a misogynist? Are you a feminist? How secure are you with All Women(tm), Classwar? I just can't get a handle on you."

Well, You All know that I thrive off Ambivalence and Contradiction. But what I can tell you is that I find myself naturally gravitating to Feminist Blogs and not finding their writing shocking/controversial at all. I just read and nod my head and say "Yep. I agree with that. That's just Common Sense, right?" So take that fact for what it's worth.

I prematurely predicted that "2012" was going to be the Number One movie for Two Weeks, but then I remembered that the new Twilight movie is coming out on Friday. Duh. My point is, Movies seem to be more Competitive these days, and that just when you thought they'd just come-out with the Biggest Money Maker, and even Bigger movie comes out within One Week. If your movie can stay strong for Two Weeks, then it's The Biggest Movie of the Year.

Somehow related is my suggestion that the "lifetime" of a movie from theatrical release to DVD release has trended shorter and shorter over recent years.

Not that Captain Obvious wants to bore You to sleep. Wake Up.

AN INTERVIEW WITH THE CLASSWAR SOLO PROJECT

How would You describe/explain Your sound to virgin ears on a desert island?

Recently I had the Archimedes Moment whereupon I realized that My Art is essentially not much more than a Tom Waits approach to Black Metal, or vice-versa. If TW wrote black metal, what would it sound like?

The somewhat longer answer is that this is not complicated, busy music. It is not at all scientific or mathematical or left-brained. "It is what it is", and what you hear is what you get. I would hope, though, that the repetitive, straightforward sound of the music converges with the worlds of "Atmosphere" and "A Grower." This is Raw, Straightforward music that keeps it Really Real and which will do the opposite of Excruciate you after a Long Day. And which may hence provide an opportunity for Meditation, Introspection and Catharsis.

Who are your main influences?

Who writes these questions? And I thought Music Journalism could not get any More Troglodytic! I argue that if, as a Musical Artist, Your main influences are other Musical Artists, you need to give it up. Pack It Up. Get Your Shit.

In order to truly create Musical Art, your primary influences Must be Nonmusical.

This Interview will continue later.

FACT: I'm a grumpy, crotchety old man. I find average people to be annoying, boorish, rude, disgraceful. I get angry when people come in and disturb my peace and quiet with pointless, obnoxious conversations. I get angry at Arabs who tend to have very passionate, loud, long, obnoxious conversations. Give me ten seconds and I'll give you all I have to say. I like going home to my room and really savouring the peace and quiet. The idea of passionate conversations does not appeal to me. What the hell can you talk about like that? I have things to say, just not an endless stream of meaningless things. I get annoyed when people don't recognize and respect that certain places are traditionally reserved for peace and quiet, like libraries or inside a movie theater. Excessive talking annoys me, especially in these types of places.

That's what especially terrible about bars. Talkativeness is encouraged, and Obnoxious Garrulousness is reinforced with alcohol. Why why why?

I don't need to talk to people every day. Once a week minimum, three times a week maximum. I'm talking about beyond small talk. Hell, I actually LIKE small talk if it's short and sweet.

When a person (usually white) says a racial slur like "Ay-rab or "n word," what they're actually saying is, "No, I don't actually know anybody of that ethnic persuasion - otherwise I wouldn't be using that word - and I'm so ignorant and prejudiced that I don't care to ever meet a person of that group." Which is sad And frustrating. Sure, I can get away with using any words I want, but that's only because I'm Effectively Edgy and not-Racist. Except against excessively talkative Blacks, Ayrabs, Russians, and Balkans.

Similar to the Face Test (r) mentioned above is the Cuddle Test. Sure, you meet relatively lots o' people where you wouldn't mind tearing their clothes off like a savage animal, but the idea of Chomping affectionately on their face - or holding them for 2 minutes - Reviles You and totally turns you off.

So yeah. Being that I cannot go up to women with attractive bodies and tear their clothes clean-off, I sometimes consider getting a hooker. Indeed, I have established a Monetary Hooker Fund. But here's the rub: It doesn't take a genius to learn Game if you want to seduce (non-hooker) troglodytes. I'm more than smart enough to learn that system. I just can't drum-up the enthusiasm/motivation to do so, and Sometimes I think I might almost rather pay a hooker than attempt to do Game. But, see, trashy trog non-hookers seem like they might be Sexier than Hookers.

See, it's always a bigass trade-off like that.

The obvious "happy medium" is to use things like AdultFriendFinder or Okcupid. People do this all the time. It works. Would I prefer to actually do one of those before I get mad enough to do Game in a Club?

Face Test, Cuddle Test, L&R Test: Yes I am picky. It is very hard finding A 50.1%-Ideal person to commit to. Everything's A Stopgap, or A superruff Approximation - never something you can truly be Happy with.

So I sat down and asked myself the bold question of "What Would Make Me Happy?", and the answer was very simple: A Good, Real Job; My Own Place; a mature real Rel with someone who passes my ridiculous tests. That's "about it."

Obviously these are Huge things and cannot be achieved overnight. But the thing is, I'm On The Path for all of these Longterm Goals: I have Savings for an Apt, and even for a Hooker. I am taking positive steps to get a Real Job and a Real Rel. But I'm learning that those things are gonna take a Longass time. So, during that time, you have to learn to be happy with the knowledge that you are indeed Taking Action. Maybe find some fun hobbies to help kill whatever "free time."

I don't like talking on the phone. I just don't. Every phone conversation with me should be kept under 2 minutes. Pref One.

I get annoyed seeing people talk on the phone with people they Like. This usually happens with Women because men don't usually Like Women, and if they do, they're about to get Screwed. (as do the Women who foolishly like men.) They smile and look relaxed and they laugh. They look happy and their body and vocal language confirms that happiness. How stupid can you be? Yeah yeah yeah, I used to be that stupid once, and I wish I could be that stupid again, bla bla fucking bla. World's Smallest Violin.

I have a good radar for Good People. Here's the problem: when you meet a person of the Attractive Gender who you Know is a Great Person, But you just cannot bring yourself to be Turned On by them, because you just can't really see yourself tearing their clothes off and boning them, let alone Jawing on their weird face. But you wish that you could Flip That Switch because they are Good, Decent, Honest People that you should probably Marry.

It's funny how people make having children the entire center of their lives. And they are happy with that. All Women(tm) have as many children as possible with as many Idiots as possible at as young of an age as possible, and then they end up hating the guys (understandable!); but then, paradoxically, then The Women act so gushingly thankful and "blessed" regarding the annoying, rude, Lilbastard children. Why do people have to have stupid children to feel good about themselves? Why can't they do that for themselves? WHAT A WORLD!

So yeah. I'm having a real Weird Thursday. It's just been a weird day. Took forever to Wake Up, and then I started being "Thoughtful" and Crabby. I am gonna feel Real Blessed when I get home and get in bed. Lawd.

See, at this juncture in my Blogging Career, I really needed to take a break and listen to my Spoken Word file. This is something that Works for me. As we all well know, I use Flashcards to fill my mind with Happy Thoughts. I get a stack of 50 flashcards, each with Positive, Happy statements on them. What I do Nowadays is record a sound file of myself reading the flashcards in my mellifluous, polytonous voice. With 50 flashcards, this file is about 10 minutes long. Perfect length. So every day as I sit in the car waiting to do my Thang, I listen to the file, to get started on the proverbial right foot. On a crabby day like today, though, I must listen to the file again, for a quick pick-me-up throughout the day.

Some of the Positive Themes include: Specific Goals; 4 things I like about Myself; optimistic "I am" and "I will" statements, Cognitive Distortion Rebuttals, etc. etc. I keep adding flashcards and taking some out; I find that 50 is a good, manageable number. Of course I save all the flashcards / old sound files so I can turn to them if I'm feeling nostalgaic and want to flip through 500 cards or listen to myself talk for 10 hours. I have nothing but good things to say about this whole System, and would recommend it to any other Angry White Men.

As ridiculous as it is to walk around and hear your own voice in your ears telling You good things about Yourself, I believe it's a Good kind of ridiculous, and might "sink in" to "reprogram" the "critical inner voice", as Stuart Smalley puts it.

Didja know that the DVD for "Stuart Saves His Family" is Out Of Print and will cost you like $70 to buy? I was somewhat disappointed by that. Toally great and underrecommended movie.

There's no such thing as "Good People" and "Bad People", only people who don't have any moral reservation about doing good or bad things more or less of the time. Hahahaha.

I never said I would never write a book. In fact, I'm more likely than the average person to write a book someday. I'm just not feeling it right now. Maybe in a couple more years once things simmer down a little.

Miley Cyrus is not a good singer. She has an annoying voice, she doesn't really sing, and her songs are annoying. That's the way it is for most of these Disney Divas. I can enjoy their TV shows, but I sure as hell cannot really enjoy their music: Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato. But Miley is The absolute worst.

You'll note that Kay Panabaker never did a "musical career." Or even Debby Ryan, for that matter.

I'm not against Sexuality per se, I'm against Stupid, Senseless, Self-Destructive Sexuality. Big difference.

I do tend to get Overstimulated kinda easily, mind.

On ebay you can find a whole bunch of so-called "mp3 players" with a 1cent starting bid. Same picture for hundreds of items. Nobody ever bids for these. Contrast: people actually do bid for the SuperCheep No-Name Chinese mp3 players. So what are these things no-one's bidding on? Wouldn't ebay remove them if they were Scams or False Advertising?

Now I'm thinking about the 30 gig Microsoft Zune as opposed to the 8 gig SanDisk Sansa. Lord, I'm perplexed. I just want the most space for the least money. One something with Simple, Str8fwd USB connectivity. That's it.

I Researched the Official Unemployment rate as of Q3 2009:
US: 9.5%
Michigan: 14.8%
Macomb County: 18.1%
Oakland County: 15.6%
Wayne County: 18.3%
Washtenaw County: 9.3%

I'm not sure what to make of this since I am not a professional economist. Official Unemployment rates can only tell us so much. Because Unemployment sez nothing about Discouraged Workers, Structurally Unemployed, or Underemployed people. You could have worked 1 hour in the past month as a MFA flipping burgers and been every bit as "officially employed" as a High-Up Database Administrator working 100 hours a week and making like $300 bucks an hour. Also the Beauraeo of Labor Statistics page is excruciatingly hard to navigate.

So, Unemployment rate means nothing because "unemployment" doesn't really mean anything. If you wanna get a better picture of how shitty an area is, you should look at the Suicide Rate.

I would have expected Wayne county to be like 30%. Or maybe that's just Detroit City Proper. I was surprised Oakland County was so high. I would have figured it no higher than the nat'l avg, at most. But you figure Oakland County is not just Bourge Hotspots like Birmingham/Bloomfield, it also include Macomb Countyesque Hick Shitholes like Lake Orion and Holly and Fenton and Waterford and Godforsaken Pontiac.

Detroit-Livonia-Dearborn is somewhere between 18.3% and 28.9%. Again, the BLS's reports are real hard to interpret.

That's it. I got a real bad headache. Seinfeld is a very good programme and if everybody watched Seinfeld every day, the world would be a much better place. Recently they've shown George Costanza at his absolute Finest. He goes up to a pretty woman in the restaurant and says "I'm 40 years old, unemployed, and I live with my parents." In another episode, he tries to milk his Unemployment Insurance for another 13 weeks by inventing a fraudulent "company" he'd "interviewed" at, uses Jerry's phone number for it, and then makes Jerry answer all phone calls as blabla company. People do not get any better than George Costanza.

BOONDOCK SAINTS II: ALL SAINTS DAY

So I celebrated getting my driver's license reinstated by making my great comeback to the Cinema. I probably should have just seen "Precious" instead. Or maybe even "2012." The Embattled Troy "So Gay It's Not Even Funny Anymore" Duffy has finally returned with his second feature, clearly hoping to cash in on what has snowballed into a surprisingly large cult. "Boondock Saints" was a good, fun movie, but I don't think it warrants being on so many people's "Favourites" Lists. Of course, All People Are Troglodytes.

Ok, "2" started off promising, and Duffy is clearly reacting to the unexpected success of BD by throwing in more than a few gratuitous Fan Moments. More Boondock Than Boondock. I was mistaken in that I thought the movie would take place in Ireland, not just merely Start Out there. The boys and their Da looked good with their hair, beards, and ridiculous Sweaters.

But as the movie wears on, it becomes more and more transparent; Duffy is going through the motions, trying to get the fans back in the seats, and make a lotta monay. It lacks whatever "j.n.s.q." the first movie had. It begins getting too shaggy, too faux-epic for its own good. Billy Connolly as "Il Duce" steals the show once again. Total Badass. But does anyone else think it's weird he was called "Il Duce"? WRONG COUNTRY, TROYBOY.

What I really wanna see is that Documentary that was all about exposing Troy Duffy as the most obnoxious asshole on the planet. Because I'm sure he is. He throws in casual misogyny, racism, and homophobia into the script with such privileged playfulness that you do have to laugh. And now they have a Mexican so they get to make Spick jokes. Believe it. It is kinda amusing, though, because as a Privileged White Racist, I can laugh at it all.

The theatre was packed and everybody seemed to love it, laughing at the horrible jokes. I admit, the movie was Mildly Amusing, but, I repeat, it was just an even hackier rehash of the original, and should disappear from theatres quickly. I'm not surprised that it has a limited release. When before, I thought, "Hmm. BD2 Just kinda slipped under the radar. I haven't even seen a preview for it." Well, after having seen it, this makes a lot more sense.

Whatever. It's still better than "Black Irish." Holy Christ was that unwatchably bad.

And BD2 has an honestly great little surprise in the penultimate scene. The ultimate scene, however, is a total groaner.

Still. I'm P!553D I wasn't able to get to "Antichrist" in time. Damn.

Now that I can legally drive, I may well attempt to be more "social" and "sociable", and will likely be going to the Movie Theatre Two to Three Times a week. I will be focused mainly on $5 specials (AMC Forum 30) and Cheep Shows (Silver Cinema Macomb Mall, Cinemark Universal Mall), but I will also shell out the big 10 bucks for a Big Movie on Friday/Saturday Night at any of the area theaters. It has to be a big-hype movie, though, with pref teenage girls sitting on my lap. I will also trek out to Main Art or - Lawd! - Maple Art to see a movie with an ArtHouse Vaunt-Factor of, say, "Antichrist". So If any Readers want to see movies, I'm Your Man.

Update: "Antichrist" is still playing at the Main Art Theatre, and I am going to see it on Wed 11/25 at 7:30 pm. But I can be flexible, if Anyone has any interest in joining me for a night of Perverted Blasphemy and Sexual Torture.

challar atchyer Slutty Friends, 11 grand, Real Jobs, Networking, Foot in the Door, buy a bottle of Meijer(r) brand aspirin for 1 dollar and don't get excruciating headaches, take big naps, play Dragon Quest 8, go to bed at 8 pm.

May You All have a Favourable Monday.